Wyatt: "What is a number higher than 100?"
Me: "101,102,103,104,105,106,107,108,109,110?"
Wyatt: (shakes his head slowly) "I will never understand you for a 110 years."

Soup

We are in the grocery store when Wyatt asks me:

Wyatt: "Mom, do you want to make cannibal soup?"

Me: "What?!"

Wyatt: "Cannibal Soup! Ya hungry for it?"

Me: "Whaaat?!"

Wyatt: "ya know, it tastes like chicken?"

Me: "Whaaaaaat?!"

Wyatt: (Pointing to a can of Campbells) " This one!"

Me: "ooooh. No thanks, somehow Im not hungry for it right now."

Sock Hop

Me: "Hey Wyatt! You know you have a Sock Hop at school tomorrow?"

Wyatt: "Yea! I would like to go to that."

Me: "Do you know what a sock hop is?"

Wyatt: "Yes. Its when you hop around in your socks only."

Dying

Wyatt has been tip toeing around death. Questions, I mean. It started a few days ago with a few general questions here and there. No biggie. Excepting for the fact that Im VERY uncomfortable with death as well as talks involving heaven etc etc. Its unfamiliar ground, if you will.
Tonight before bed we had this conversation :

Wyatt: "Do parents die before kids?"

Me: (ok, so my mind is racing, do I say yes? or do I say sometimes?) "Parents dont usually die until they are very very old. Then they go to heaven to be with God."

Wyatt: "But you said you stopped growing"

Me: (I told him yesterday that Im all done growing and I wont get any taller) "Yes, Im done getting taller, but everyday I get a little older. Everyone does. Everyday people get older."

Wyatt: "Am I going to die? I dont want to die!!"

Me: (Careful mom) "Not until you are very very very old"

Wyatt: "Are you going to die?"

Me: (DANGER, DANGER!) "Not until you are a very old man with a wife and kids of your own."

Wyatt: "Whens my birthday?"

Me: (OH THANK GOD! We have moved on from this conversation)
"In a little under a year"

Wyatt: "THATS WHEN IM GONNA DIE?!"

Me: (SHIT!) "No! Good gravy Wyatt!"

Wyatt: "I dont want you to send me away to heaven!"

Me: (Well played mom, well played) "Where do you want to go!?"

Wyatt: "I just want to stay in the house!"

Me: (Kind of wish the floor would just swallow me) God Wyatt! *kiss, kiss* You are not going to die, Im not going to die, we are all going to get old and be happy, go to sleep, dream of a playground or a swingset or a freakin' swimming pool!"

I swear next time Im lying. "We are going to live forever." I think I made it worse.
Yikes. Is all I can say. I seriously would rather have a conversations about penises and vagina's, and proper condom usage than have another discussion about death.

Mmmm ahhh

Emma dumped out 2 whole bottles of shampoo and conditioner onto the bathroom floor. Was a bitch to clean up but on the plus side, this joint smells like cherry almond now.

Well!

The visit with dad went well.
Wyatt and I had all these big ideas of places we wanted to go with dad but they were quickly abandoned after he got here. I think we all just wanted to hang around at home and be with each other. (Cant really do that at Betty Brinns!)
It was a great visit and I think it may have done Wyatt some good. Now he knows that dad will come visit and his being gone is only temporary.
When Randy got in the car from the airport Emmas face lit up and it was ll "Daddy! Daddy! I looove yoooou!"
THEN.......
(HOURS after he got home) It was sweet to hear Wyatt whisper to dad, "Im happy you're home daddy, I missed you"

Visit from Daddy

Randy will be coming home for a visit tomorrow night. He'll be here until Sunday night.
Im very excited to see him of course and Emma will be over the moon, but Wyatt is a bit more cautious than that. He's hyper-aware that dad is only going to be here for 2 days. And he prefers that "dad stays here forever" Im getting the feeling that dads quick trip home is just going to cause a huge ripple in Wyatts behavior after he leaves Sunday.
As it is Wyatt finally had an emotional enema over Randy's being gone. The other day he had some tears and some yelling over the whole shit and shaboodle. This kid is not a happy camper. And I haven't a clue how to deal with it. Im doing the best I can, saying the things I think need to be said but I have this horrible feeling that this Randy here then gone crap is going to be character building towards the negative. Ya know ? His behavior hasn't been good at school since Randy left. Am I being too "granola mom" by blaming it on the trauma of Randy being gone so long ? Would I feel better if I could say that this spurt of crap behavior is normal 6 year old boy stuff and it will be gone as quick as it came? You betcha.

The things they say

Emma heard some geese outside the other day, we went to investigate. She saw them all up in the air, then promptly headed back for the door, yelling, "No!! Don't poop on me!" Interesting... when she chooses to finally belt out a sentence... THATS what she comes out with.

Wyatt has informed me that the reason our house isnt selling is because of the painting above the fireplace. Apparently he thinks its "gauche"