Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Cake anyone ?

Went to my Weight Watchers meeting this morning. I weighed 9.6 lbs less this week. *happy dance* This is exactly what I needed to keep me going. Whew.

I ordered Wyatt's Mickey Mouse cake today from Piggly Wiggly. Same thing at O&H costed $12 more. Crazy..its just flour sugar and water. Yesh.
I hope Wyatt's looming cold goes away or stays at bay until after his party. He's got a cough today and a fever. Fan-bloody-tastic.
Emma has a runny nose...no knew news there. She's had a perpetual runny nose since she started teething. I'm so happy with her. Shes got 2 teeth, can roll both ways, and sits all by herself. It's going so fast. With Wyatt, it seemed he stayed a baby forever. I guess this is what happens when you don't have a preemie baby. You blink and the infant days are over! Makes me want to have another baby. HA...riiiiiight. The only way that's happening is if Randy gets out of the Navy in July. Which deep down I know that not going to happen. But..that's a whole different rant.

AH! My youngest bellows.

Ta ta

Sunday, January 27, 2008

whoops

I just entered what I've been eating this week onto my spark people thingy. Im not even close to the 1450-1800 calories I should be eating during the day. I hit on 1173 yesterday. Whoops. Nowhere near the fat, carbs either. But Im an A student in the protein department.
So...is my body going to go into starvation mode if I continue, or will the fat melt off my ass ? Let see come weigh in on Tuesday.
I think I might just have a slice of cake at my grandma's birthday party tonight :)

Saturday, January 26, 2008

Preference for Mom

Randy is not allowed to feed Emma. Per Emma's rules. Which means I cannot leave when its time for her to eat. I cannot be gone so long that I would run into a feeding schedule issue.
Don't know why. She's ok with him in general but not when it comes to him feeding her.
It's really hard on him actually. Last night, he attempted to give her the nighttime feeding and she bellowed and bellowed. I was in the other room giving Wyatt his bath, and Randy calls me in to feed her. I take over and Randy goes into the bathroom to help Wyatt out. Wyatt then says "Not You! I want MOM!" Ouch. Poor Randy... double wammy. Sooooo, not sure what to do about that.

The boys had a nice morning just the two of them. They went to see Veggie Tales Pirate movie. No idea what it's called. Wyatt sat through the whole movie (a first!) and then they went to Mc. D's. That's actually the first time Randy and Wyatt have had an "outing" just them two. I think Wyatt is needing our one on one attention more and more now that Em has taken up a small amount of his floor play space. She was ok when she was just sitting in her bouncy, but now that she rolls in the direction of his toys... game over.

Em and I went to my eye appt. Yay! How exciting right? Contacts, glasses misc. fees....close to $300.00 That's insane. If I hadn't signed up for their oh so special club card it would have been more like $500. Urgh. Oh..and I have cornea damage. Lovely.

On a nice note. I was convinced to go to a Weight Watchers thingy. With the exception of me and a few others the meeting consisted of the 70's and up crowd. So I felt a little out of place. Anyway, I joined and its going alright. I don't come no where near my preset amount of "points" each day. Seriously...I don't really eat a lot. My problem is what I eat (wine, pasta, wine, bagels, beer, etc) and when (7, 8, 11pm etc) So.... I have stopped most my vises, and now I feel like I'm constantly hungry. Like I got an itch I can't scratch. At least smaller amounts are satisfying me. That's a great feeling. I kinna like hunger pains.

Monday, January 21, 2008

Mean Mommy

Mothers-
Do you ever feel like you are constantly telling your kids "no" ?
I feel like Im such a drag. I feel like Im constantly telling Wyatt no. "Don't push on Emma" "No candy" "No more this" "Don't touch that"
I sometimes wonder if maybe I'm being too anal cause I may be in a bad mood ? Or if as a mother you are really required to stick all these sanctions on your children ?
I then will usually go into explaining why I am saying no. I lose him halfway through. See now, I don't know if I lose him because he's an Autism spectrum kid or if I really am truly boring the child with my reasoning's. Maybe both ?

Anyway.

We went to Shedd's today. It really went better than expected. I wasn't totally impressed by the place itself, but Wyatt seemed to have a blast. Lots of questions and stares and things he's never seen. We saw a Dolphin show and he actually clapped and said "Yay!" It was soooo nice to see him relating and enjoying something. Mothers of autistic children...you know what Im talking about ;)

On a side note. I hate football. I don't get it. But, I found myself stuck to the T.V. last night watching the Packers Giants game. It was 20 - 20 for so long, it was like watching a good suspense thriller. At the height of suspense I was brought out of my stupor by my husband swearing some intelligible things about the f'ing Packers. Ah well.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Popping my Blog Cherry

I'm not one for lengthy introductions, so I'll just jump right into thingys.

Have you ever thought things in your head, that you knew if you said them out loud you'd lose friends and everyone around you would think your a complete bitch ? Some people have the distinct pleasure of being able to say those things with frankly, not giving a damn. I'm not one of those people. I placate and go with the flow of conversation I think those around me would rather hear. Thinking it might make me likable and maybe make a friend. It really hasn't been working out of me too well. I've made a few friends, but I do not think I'm all that likable. I try to make new friends even now, and it never pans out. Now why is that ? Should I say what I really think knowing damn well its not the norm ? Is it that my oldest child is not exactly the picture perfect stepford kid ? Is it because Im a fat chick ? I think I have a pretty decent disposition.
Lately, the line I have drawn between what I say and what I know I shouldn't say has become very very thin. And more things I probably shouldn't say have been sneaking in. Now, Im not talking about things that are completely in bad taste and manners. Just my ability to let things pass has seemed to come to a stop.
In Racine... we had plastic fetuses sent to our homes from Wisconsin right to life. Nice. Their theory was that this doll was supposed to educate. "This is what a 11 month old fetus looks like" Where, what they were really trying to say was "I don't know if you've had an abortion, but look at this doll, and look at what you killed, you should be ashamed of yourself" Again...more people that don't come out and say what they mean. Anyway... I was sick by it. I miscarried a young baby, not quite 11 weeks, but close. I knew I was miscarrying so I went to the hospital. I got up to go to the bathroom and when I sat (so graphic) I felt something push I for some reason I stuck my hand down to catch or grab whatever it was. It was my baby. It was like it was a figure of grey and blood. It was horrible. I screamed. Anyway, its vivid in my mind so I was not pleased to get a plastic replica of the baby I lost. Sooooo, my line of decency thinned, and I found out the names of the people who sent it, as well as....where they work, that address, where they live/ph #, their church......And I stuck all the information on any blog in Racine I could find so that people who were as discontented as I was could send theirs back directly to the source.


See, I think the problem is, that deep down, I'm not a nice person. I want to be, and that's why most the time I say what I think I should say. I want my children to be nice people, so I poop rainbows for them. I am the mother I want them to have, not the mother I think I actually am. Wow...now who's hypocritical huh ?

Maybe I should just break down my line and just say the things I want to say. Maybe then I'll make friends...the other way doesn't seem to be working anyway. Annnnd, I won't be here in another year so, no foul ?

I probably make no sense

About Me

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Im the mother of a 7 yr. old and a 10 year old. Married for 100 years to a sailor. Formally a criminal justice student that got lots of sleep and laid on a bed not covered in goldfish crackers.